THE POSTMAN'S CORNER
Say not always what you know, but always know what you say.
Claudius
GOOD MORNING POSTMAN FANS!
In case you are interested, yesterday was groundhog day.
Tradition has it that if he comes out from his burrow and
does not see his shadow, spring will come early.
Punxsutawney Phil emerged from his lair Saturday
in front of thousands but didn't see his shadow.
Legend has it that if the furry rodent sees his shadow
on Feb. 2 on Gobbler's Knob in west-central Pennsylvania,
winter will last six more weeks. But if he doesn't
see his shadow, spring will come early. Research shows
that the groundhog theory of weather prediction is only
37% accurate. This pales in comparison to the record of
The Postman's Corner, which can be counted on 100% of the
time to bring a smile to your face :)
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
____________
THE COMICS
the sun
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z851.html
bathroom rules
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z852.html
anti car jacking device
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z853.html
waiting
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z854.html
a marvelous invention
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z855.html
someone is in
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z856.html
you forgot your lunch
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z857.html
now playing
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z858.html
the right way
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/z859.html
______________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Lotto - Lucky Dog
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2856.html
Volkswagen Commercial
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2857.html
Funny Insane boy university
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2858.html
Harlem Globetrotters
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/da/a2859.html
Q: What is better than winning a medal at the Special Olympics?
A: Not being retarded
Q: What is the difference between princess Diana and Tiger Woods?
A: Tiger has a better driver!
Q: What's the difference between Mozart and Trayvon Martin?
A: Mozart was good at composing, Trayvon is currently decomposing.
Q: How can you tell if you have really bad acne?
A: If the blind can read your face.
Q: What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A: Widow
_________
A Frenchman, an Englishman and a New Yorker were captured
by cannibals. The chief comes to them and says, "The bad
news is that now we've caught you and we're going to kill you.
We will put you in a pot, cook you, eat you and then we're going
to use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you
can choose how to die."
The Frenchman says, "I take ze sword." The chief gives him a sword,
the Frenchman says, "Vive la France!" and runs himself through.
The Englishman says, "a pistol for me please." The chief gives
him a pistol, the Englishman points it at his head and says,
"God save the queen!" and blows his brains out.
The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork!" The chief is puzzled, but
he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the fork
and starts jabbing himself all over--the stomach, the sides, the
chest, everywhere. There is blood gushing out all over, it's horrible.
The chief is appalled and asks, "My God, what are you doing?"
And the New Yorker responds, "So much for your canoe you stupid cannibal!
______________
You might be a redneck if...
You own more cowboy boots than sneakers.
You've been to a funeral and there were more pick-ups than cars.
You have a picture of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, or Elvis over your fireplace.
You just bought an 8-track player to put in your car.
There are four or more cars up on blocks in the front yard.
It's easier to spray weed killer on your lawn than mow it.
You think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors.
__________
NASA decided to send a shuttle into space with two monkeys and an
astronaut. They trained them for months. Then when they thought
they were all ready, they placed all three in the shuttle and got ready
to send them up into space. As the moment came closer NASA's mission
control center announced, ''This is mission control to Monkey One. Do
your stuff.''
At that the first monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the
shuttle's engines ignited and the shuttle took off. Two hours later
NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to
Monkey Two. Do your stuff.''
At that the second monkey started typing like mad and suddenly the
shuttle separated from the empty fuel tanks. Another two hours later
NASA's mission control center announced, ''This is mission control to
the astronaut...''
At this the astronaut shouted ''I know, I know. Feed the fucking
monkeys and don't touch anything.''
_________________
Fun pages
Photo Heat Map
http://tinyurl.com/ae7ce5d
Dog Cleaning The Toilet
http://tinyurl.com/ayqt9gg
Silly Puns
http://tinyurl.com/acbyfr7
Give Her The Flowers
http://tinyurl.com/bb73okv
Mario Journey Hacked
http://tinyurl.com/b2q8gmm
THAT'S ALL FOLKS
Have a nice day
FROM:
Martin aka the postman
__._,_.___
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