welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
So the other day, I was out in the yard and noticed
several holes in the siding of my shed. Close inspection
suggested they were caused by a pellet gun and the
trajectory most likely came from the "trailer park transients"
and the drug house next door. I called the boys in blue.
They did their inspection and I told them that there
was a young kid I had seen next door with that kinda gun.
They went over to talk to them. A little while later, there is a knock
at my door, and somebody is standing there claiming to be pop:
said that he would pay for the damage.. ,,,lesson to
parents, don't give your 14 year old boy a pellet gun for
Christmas.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
PS. It will restore my faith in miracles if I ever see a
check
_________________
MEMES N TOONS
will I be ok doc
firing you was not enough
how was your day
can't reach the vacuum
when you can walk on water
go deeper
banning words in California
Dave was born without eyelids
you get pussy
the toilet
I love you
after 2 hours of just kissing
did nothing for my sore throat
open sesame
you lied
One day, this man, Tony, died. When he was sent to be judged, he
was told that he had committed a sin, and that he could not go to
heaven right away. He asked what he did and God told him that he cheated on
his income taxes, and that the only way he could get into heaven would be
to sleep with a 500 pound, stupid, butt-ugly woman for the next five
years and enjoy it.
Tony decided that this was a small price to pay for an eternity in
heaven.So off he went with this enormous woman, pretending to be happy.
As he was walking along, he saw his friend Carlos up ahead.
Carlos was with an even bigger, uglier woman than he was with. When
he approached Carlos he asked him what was going on, and Carlos replied
"I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot
of money...even more then you did."
They both shook their heads in understanding and figured that as long
as they have to be with these women, they might as well hang out
together to help pass the time.
Now Tony, Carlos, and their two beastly women were walking along,
minding their own business when Tony and Carlos could have sworn that they saw
their friend Jon up ahead, only this man was with an absolutely drop
dead gorgeous supermodel/centerfold. Stunned, Tony and Carlos approached
the man and in fact it was their friend Jon. They asked him how is he
with this unbelievable goddess, while they were stuck with these god-awful
women.Jon replied "I have no idea, and I'm definitely not complaining.
This has been absolutely the best time of my life (and I'm dead,) and I have
five years of the best sex any man could hope for to look forward to.
There is only one thing that I can't seem to understand.
After everytime we have sex, she rolls over and murmur's to
herself, "Damn income taxes
A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I
have a problem. I bought these two talking female
parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."
"What do they say?", the priest asked.
"They only know how to say Hi, we are prostitutes.
Do you want to have some FUN?"
"That's terrible", the priest exclaimed, "But I have
a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking
female parrots over to my house and I will put
them with my two male talking parrots who I have
taught to pray and read the Bible, then my parrots
will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible
phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray
and worship.""Thank you." said the lady.
So the next day, the lady brings her female parrots
to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots
are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage.
The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the
male talking parrots and the female parrots say,
"Hi, we are prostitutes Do you want to have some FUN?"
One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot
and says,
"Put the bibles away Our prayers have been answered"
_____________________
JOKES
little Mary was now a teenager
2 old men in the nursing home
2 old ladies went to a retirement home...
top ten things only women understand
doc I'm turning 80 tomorrow
Victor fell in love
I became a prostitute
a young couple were having sex every night
Marines suck
2 roaches were munching on garbage
_____________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Live PD: Retired Bank Robber
TOP HUSBAND VS WIFE ULTIMATE FUNNY PRANKS OF 2018
27 EXAMPLES OF HOW NOT TO DRIVE IN THE SNOW
If it were not filmed, no one would believe
10 Amazing & Unique People Around The World
People Are Awesome 2019
Raccoons and Peanut Butter Sandwiches
BEST FEMINIST CRINGE COMPILATION
Dumbest Liberal Gun Quotes
Silent Love
_______________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
female medical exam
a magical moment
don't tell anyone
my neighborhood barber
when she is on her knees
I'm sorry
free
hacked
how to tell
Mary Poppins
what it looks like
a lot of blame
felt sorry for him
so good last night
a penis had a hard life
__._,_.___
Posted by: martin7957@yahoo.com
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