I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me
welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
man, what a bummer. It was like 70s and gorgeous,
just a couple days ago. and yesterday? SNOW! WTF???
so, like sooner or later, spring and summer, they gonna happen,
right? If you are like a lot of us seniors, you got a limited
income? Money a little tight? Well here is a money saving
idea to help you save your pennies and make summer a
little more enjoyable...
we do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially,
Martin aka the postman
_____________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS
why did you split with your husband
that was close
bad luck
The King of Stupid Questions | Dennis Regan
low fat diet
limit your breaks
no idea
about to get worse
how is it going
endless bread sticks
its not the 80s anymore
doesn't watch porn
joke of the day
this baby
repeating them
_____________________
JOKES
having an argument in bed
God and Moses were out golfing
good and bad
men have more hair than women
excuse me sir what time is it
there was a little mouse in his hole in the wall
what did you name the ranch
first communion
branding cows
lost virginity
A man goes into a little neighborhood pub, and when he sits
down, he notices a beautiful
woman sitting at the other end of the bar.
He waves to her, and much to his surprise,
woman sitting at the other end of the bar.
He waves to her, and much to his surprise,
she winks back at him. It doesn't take long
before he is on the stool next to her.
They talk for about fifteen minutes and then the man
before he is on the stool next to her.
They talk for about fifteen minutes and then the man
says to the woman, "You're really hot!"" You're pretty cute,
too," she says to him. "I'll tell you what.
I live just around the corner. What do you think about
I live just around the corner. What do you think about
coming up to my place?" It sounds great!" the man eagerly replies.
"Before we go up there though", the woman says,
"Before we go up there though", the woman says,
"I have to ask you one question:
Do you like doing it Greek style?"
"Well...uh...I'm not exactly sure what that is, man answers,
Do you like doing it Greek style?"
"Well...uh...I'm not exactly sure what that is, man answers,
"but it sure sounds interesting and I'm willing to learn! Let's go!"
So the two of them walk over to her apartment.
As soon as they get inside the door, the woman rips off
So the two of them walk over to her apartment.
As soon as they get inside the door, the woman rips off
all her clothes. The man can't believe his eyes. The woman
has an incredibly beautiful body. "Now, you're *sure*,"
the woman asks, "that you want to do it Greek style?"
"Definitely!" the man replies.
"All right, then," says the woman.
"Definitely!" the man replies.
"All right, then," says the woman.
"Take off all your clothes, and get up on
the bed on yours hands and knees."
the bed on yours hands and knees."
"Sounds like fun!" the man exclaims. He leaps
out of his clothes and climbs onto the bed on his
out of his clothes and climbs onto the bed on his
hands and knees. The woman goes
around and gets onto the bed right in front of the man.
She kneels down in front of his head. She asks him again,
"Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?"
"Yeah! Yeah!" says the man.
The woman grabs the man with her arms right under
around and gets onto the bed right in front of the man.
She kneels down in front of his head. She asks him again,
"Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?"
"Yeah! Yeah!" says the man.
The woman grabs the man with her arms right under
his armpits, getting him in a lock hold. He can't move at all,
and his head is pressing right into her chest.
One more time she says,
"Are you sure that you want to do it Greek style?"
The man's muffled voice can barely be heard
The man's muffled voice can barely be heard
from between her breasts.
"Yeah!" he mumbles, "Greek style!"
The woman's grip on him tightens like a vice, and she yells out,
"GUS! Come out here!!!"
"Yeah!" he mumbles, "Greek style!"
The woman's grip on him tightens like a vice, and she yells out,
"GUS! Come out here!!!"
Paddy O'Toole woke up one fine morning with a
monstrous hangover. "Ooooooooooweeeee!" He thinks
to himself, "Paddy, me boy, ye got to get yerself back
on the straight and narrow......get down to St.
Swithens and make yer confession to Father O'Staggers
Swithens and make yer confession to Father O'Staggers
and start with a clean slate."
But, first he needs to get his courage up. So he
But, first he needs to get his courage up. So he
rummages around and finds some courage, in a gallon jug.
He weaves his way down to the church and into the
confessional. "Faaaather, I done sinned and sinned
baaaaaad! Oooooooooooweeeeeee!" Well, he nearly
knocks the Padre out of the booth with his breath.
"Paddy, me lad, have ye killed anybody?" "
No Faaaather, I ain't been killin' nobody today.
"Paddy, me lad, have ye killed anybody?" "
No Faaaather, I ain't been killin' nobody today.
Ooooooooooweeeeeee!" "Well, off with ye then. Go
your way in peace and sin no more." As Paddy
stumbles out of the church and down the steps,
he runs into his old friend Shamus Flannegan.
Shamus is in the same shape as Paddy and on a
he runs into his old friend Shamus Flannegan.
Shamus is in the same shape as Paddy and on a
simular mission. "So, tell me Shamus, do ye be
going to confession this morning?"
"Yes, Paddy, I done sinned and sinned bad."
"And have ye killed anyone Shamus?"
"No, Paddy, I ain't killed nobody."
"Well, don't be wastin' yer time then Shamus.
Father O'Staggers is only hearing murder
"Yes, Paddy, I done sinned and sinned bad."
"And have ye killed anyone Shamus?"
"No, Paddy, I ain't killed nobody."
"Well, don't be wastin' yer time then Shamus.
Father O'Staggers is only hearing murder
confessions today!"
__________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Dennis Regan standup
City Councilman Arrested for Interfering With Police
People Who Tried, but FAILED! Funniest Fails
The Dumbest Things Ever Said In Court!
Paul Harvey News Nov 22, 1963 | The Death of JFK
Rebecca De Unamuno - Truth in Tampon Advertising
Baby Elephant's first 3 days
Hilarious Animals: Pets Making Fun of Their Owners
Short Silent Comedy
HOW HIGH DO THEM JEEP CHEROKEES FLY
__________________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
a crack head said...
take it to the bedroom
bubble wrap
the human race
respond with sarcasm
left him last week
girls mature faster
dust
no coffee
I said "hi"
so bored
cuddles on demand
taste like chicken
dear Abby
excersize
__._,_.___
Posted by: martin7957@yahoo.com
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