If you have trouble getting your children's attention,
just sit down and look comfortable.
welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
HELLO POSTMAN FANS!
It is the first day of astronomical spring!
There are actually 2 different first days of spring. There is meteor logical
spring and there is astronomical spring. Today,
In the astronomical calendar, the start and end dates of spring are
based on the changing position of Earth in relation to the sun and
the resulting solar events of equinoxes and solstices. Both night
and day are pretty much equal, in length, supposedly. In the Northern
Hemisphere winter ends and spring starts at the moment of the March
equinox, which occurs every year between March 19 and March 21.
Spring ends and summer starts. The great part of it? The weather man
says there is a chance of snow today. Ain't that wonnerful?
Go figger!
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman
________________
THE FUNNY PAPERS
how much for a hand job
you want to get out of here
reading the instruction manual
a gender reveal party
body hair
did you know
flirt w other girls again
unlock your phone
out of control
do you like it
ladies first
learning life lessons
a repo man
free range chickens
an old friend
__________________
JOKES
the old widower finally asked her to marry him
man had tickets for the 50 yard line at the Bowl
ten rules of housekeeping
Excuse me sir, are you American?
visiting sister in Chicago
thank you for calling
tech support
the minister from Florida
in her own eyes
A dedicated Teamsters union worker was attending a convention
in Las Vegas and, as you would expect,
decided to check out the brothels nearby.
When he got to the first one, he asked the Madam, "Is this a union house?"
"No," she replied. "I'm sorry, it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $80.00 and the girls get $20.00."
Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off
down the street in search of a more
equitable, hopefully unionized shop.
His search continued until finally he reached a brothel where the
Madam responded, "Why, yes, sir, this IS a Union House."
The man asked, "And if I pay you $100.00, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80.00 and the house gets $20.00."
"That's more like it!" the union man said. So he handed the
Madam $100.00, looked around the
room and pointed to a stunningly ?attractive blonde.
"I'd like her for the night."
"I'm sure you would, sir," said the Madam, then gesturing to an 85-
year old woman in the corner,
"but according to union rules, Ethel here has seniority."
DAD'S EXPLANATION
Son: "Dad, why does love-making makes you feels good?"
Dad: "Just like digging in your nose, it's feels good, right!"
Son: "Why is it that guys don't usually feel as good as gals?"
Dad: "Just like when you dig in your nose,
it's your nose that feel?s good, not your finger!"
Son: "Then why do gals feel bad when they are raped?"
Dad: "If a stranger comes along and digs in your nose,
will you feel the? same way?"
Son: "When girls are having their menstruation, why don't they
usually? want to have sex?"
Dad: "If your nose is bleeding, will you still want your nose to be? dug?"
Son: "Dad, one last question ... why don't guys like to wear condoms
when they make love?"
Dad: "Would you want to wear a glove when you dig your nose?"
Morris, a 63-year old, comes home from the office early.
He enters his bedroom, and sees his best friend Sam,
on top of his nude 62 year old wife.
Morris, shaking his head, says, "Sam, I have to, BUT YOU?"
__________________
LETS GO TO THE MOVIES
Appalachian Settlers and Their Dwellings
Driveway dispute lands owner out of biz
Bear Charge
Dude Perfect: Bad Joke Telling
Chimps Go Outdoors for the First Time!
Daniel Tosh - "People Pleaser (2016)" Stand Up Comedy Special
New Bill Burr talking groups, vatican, racism
Ren Stimpy Don't Whiz On The Electric Fence!
Fire rages at Texas chemical plant near Houston
Monty Python - Adventures of Martin Luther
___________________
A LITTLE BIT OF HUMOR
be nice to someone
sarchotic
chairdrobe
blow me
getting older
my dog used to chase ppl
most ppl
9 out of 10 husbands
wife's diet
your parking fee
__._,_.___
Posted by: martin7957@yahoo.com
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