[buffalos-adult-chips] Chips For 11-24-11

 



Adult Adult

Welcome to Buffalosjokes and Thank You for joining us. My
name is Buffalo and I have the watch.

I have been in bed for over a week now, and on my one trip out
to go to the bathroom my back and knee gave out and if I hadn't
been able to bounce off the couch I would have spent the night
on the floor. I have increased the dosage of allopurinol and
just finished my second can of cherries. Ireally do think they
helped my back but my ankles feel worse and I am stuck in my
bedroom till it changes because even with painkillers it hurts too
much to walk. I am seldom alone though even in my exile. Dini
lays at the head of my bed and Yoda at the foot. Buffy is usually
working at my spare computer about 16 hours a day and Eva comes
in to liven things up and has stopped hitting my sore knee and
ankles or at least till the next time she runs amok.

A very Happy Thanksgiving to all those living in the states today.
It has been a good year for me this year. I have had just enough
money and an over abundance of love from family and friends
to make it till today. A special thanks to my doctor who has kept
me alive in spite of my efforts to destroy myself, I hope that everyone
has someone like him looking out for them.

I was remembering a Thanksgiving probably about six years ago
where Sandy had been up early and got the bird in the oven and I
was out here on the computer working on the lists. It was a huge
turkey and it wouldn't fit in our usual black roaster so I had gotten
one of those disposable aluminum foil ones. I went out to the kitchen
and basted the turkey and slid it back in the oven and sat back down
at the computer.

Pretty soon it started to get a little smoky and I looked out into the
kitchen and smoke was pouring out of the oven. I ran out and shut
the oven off and opened the door and found the foil pan was leaking
juice and it was burning on the floor of the oven. I opened the back
door and the front door to get some air flowing and drained the
liquid from the turkey into the gravy pan and as there was still a lot
of
smoke and little pieces of soot floating in the air, I went into Sandy's
room and opened the window. As I did several of the cats decided to
make a break for the fresh air and dove out of the windows. I put a
box fan in her window and turned it on and since it was only about 35
deg outside sat there and shivered till the smoke was gone and I could
turn the oven back on.

About that time one of the cats who had escaped dove from the
porch rail to the top of the fan in Sandy's window and knocked it
to the floor. I went in and shut the fan off and shut Sandy's window
and then as I was leaving to go close the doors, Sandy sat up in
bed and said, " What was that noise." I wish I could sleep that soundly.

Enjoy your Thanksgiving Dinner and thank you all for a great year.

buffalo

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Adult orientated, Semi-Moderated humor list.
Filled with jokes and toons, pix n info, Basically anything but SPAM!
ABSOLUTELY NO GRAPHIC, KIDDIE or BESTALITY nudity ALLOWED
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Alabama Chips
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The Bass Boat

A good ole ALABAMA boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought
it
home and his wife looks at him and says, "What the hell you gonna do
with
that. There ain't no water deep enough to float a boat within 75 miles
of
here.

He says, "I won it and I'm a gonna keep it."

His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees the wife and
asks where his brother is. She says, "He's out there in his bass boat",
pointing to the field behind the house.

The brother heads out behind the house and sees his brother sitting in a
bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand down in the middle of a big
field. He yells out to him, "What the hell are you doing?"

His brother replies "I'm fishin. What the hell does it look like I'm
a doing."

His brother yells back,.................. "It's people like you that
give
people from ALABAMA a bad name, making everybody think we are stupid.
If I could swim, I'd come out there and kick your ass."

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Toon Chips For Those Who Can't Wait

battery love
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w001.html

deep enough
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w002.html

topless barber shop
http://www.thepostmanscorner.net/w003.html

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Knock Knock Chips
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THANKSGIVING KNOCK-KNOCK JOKES
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Gladys.
Gladys who?
Gladys Thanksgiving! Aren't you?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Harry.
Harry who?
Harry up! I'm starved!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey have to wait long to eat?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Luke.
Luke who?
Luke at all the food!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Odefte.
Odette who?
Odette's a big turkey!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Phillip.
Phillip who?
Phillip a big plate and dig in!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Emma.
Emma who?
Emma real pig when it comes to eating Turkey!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Esther.
Esther who?
Esther any more gravy?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive the stuffing too!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Aaron.
Aaron who?
Aaron you having more cranberry sauce?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Don.
Don who?
Don eat all the stuffing, I want some more!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Arthur,
Arthur who?
Arthur any more sweet potatoes?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Alma.
Alma who?
Alma dinner's gone. May I have dessert?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Wanda.
Wanda who?
Wanda piece of pumpkin pie?

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Norma Lee.
Norma Lee who?
Norma Lee I don't eat this much!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
General Lee.
General Lee who?
General Lee I don't either!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Aida.
Aida who?
Aida lot more than I should have!

Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Tamara.
Tamara who?
Tamara, we'll have turkey leftovers!

Knock, Knock.
Who's there?
Waddle.
Waddle who?
Waddle I do if you don't open the door?

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Memories Music N More
Memories old and new, it can make you happy, energized, thoughtful,
let you dream or just take you back.
We at MMNM know you don't want a lot of DND's, 2 mandatory sends
and No drama, you just want good ole time.
We send a wide variety, from oldies and country to gospel and rap.
Wavs and MP3s. Full CDs and singles. Would prefer MP3. Have a song
you've looked for and can't find? Our request link will get it
for you quickly. Like some of the music but not all?
We remind you every day to take what you want, delete what you don't.
Give us a try at MMNM......where it's ALL about the music & a little
more!
(MMM has been open since Nov 30, 2009)
I Want The Music!!!

angelbearlady32@aol.com, MySissyCat12@aol.com;

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Nativity Chips
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Supreme Court rules no Nativity scene in DC

The Supreme Court has ruled that there cannot be a Nativity Scene in the
United
States' Capital this Christmas season.

This isn't for any religious reason. They simply have not been able to
find
Three Wise Men in the Nation's Capitol.

A search for a Virgin continues. Most of the congressional aides have
been gone through.

There was no problem, however, finding enough asses to fill the stable.

Tom R.

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C's PLACE TOO

A small group where you can post trades, recipes, small items for sale.
To join:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/csplacetoo

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Thanksgiving Chips
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A History of Thanksgiving

1492 - Christopher Columbus discovers America, unless you
count the native peoples already living there. Columbus doesn't.
Columbus and
crew celebrate by holding a dinner, giving thanks for their safe
arrival.
Embarrassment ensues when every Indian brings maize, and nobody brings
pumpkin
pie.

1620 - Pilgrim men invent sport of football to avoid
helping clean up after Thanksgiving dinner.

1671 - First embarrassing drunken relatives at Thanksgiving dinner, as
Captain
John Smith's parents tell Pocahontas the "hilarious" old "I got lost in
the
maize" joke for the hundredth time.

1701 - At a historic Thanksgiving dinner, Dutch settlers
unveil historic "Indians Give Us All Of Their Land Treaty."
Due to an unfortunate oversight, the Indians are left off
of the invite list, and the treaty is signed without them.

1776 - Excited that his British in-laws finally agreed to
meet him for Thanksgiving dinner, silversmith Paul Revere
rides through Boston announcing the news. Unfortunately,
many colonists misinterpret his cry "the British are
coming!" as a warning, leading to the Revolutionary War.

1812 - At an international Thanksgiving dinner, King George
of England, still hurting from losing the Revolutionary War, challenges
United
States President James Madison to "best 2 out of 3."

1860 - At a Senate Thanksgiving dinner, the seven-year-old
son of Alabama's Senator Richard Applebee insults the
Senators from Massachusetts, New York, and Pennsylvania, sparking the
Civil War.
The tradition of the "children's table" is instituted in 1861.

1903 - Canada steals idea of Thanksgiving holiday, placing
it in October, so they can say it was their idea first.

1928 - To commemorate "our nation's greatest era of
prosperity that will last forever and ever," President
Herbert Hoover dumps ceremonial ten thousand turkeys into
the Potomac River.

1929 - Following the Great Stock Market Crash, thousands of
men go Turkey Diving in the Potomac River.

1957 - Declaring her spicy stuffing "a communist threat to undermine my
health
via heartburn," Senator Joe McCarthy has his wife placed under arrest as
a
Soviet saboteur.

1969 - The world's largest Eat-In event goes sour. Thousands
of hippies start having bad trips when bad "brown gravy"
gets passed around.

1991 - When Dan Quayle takes ill on Thanksgiving; a turkey
is sworn as Vice President for three days. No change is noticed.

1997 - Strong natural tranquilizer tryptophane is discovered
in turkey. A Colombian cartel immediately starts selling
"pure" turkey on the streets for $500 an ounce. Turkey
farmers get involved in drive-by shootings, and the U.S. government
declares a
national fowl emergency.

2002 - America is on a terrorist alert. It is now against the law to
stuff a
turkey since anyone is suspicious of hiding explosives. George W. signs
this law
into Congress, during a patriotic speech he defends this decision
claiming "the
evil doers are just looking for any opportunity to show up at your
dinner
table." This Thanksgiving take a real good look at your relatives...and
report
any suspicious behavior to the CIA, FBI or your local police...who cares
if it's
grandma...it's your duty as an American...

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Jetts Adult Playground
Hi come and have some fun with us!!
We share hunks babes adult cartoons
Also have question of the day
You must share in the group as you are the life line of the group
See ya in the playground!!

      

Click link to join:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Jetts_Adult_Playground/join

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Thanksgiving Chips
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Things to Do to Liven Up Thanksgiving Dinner

1. Load your plate up high, then take it to the kitchen,
toss it all in the blender, and take your "shake" back to the table.
Announce
that it's the new Thanksgiving Weight Loss Shake.

2. When everyone goes around to say what they are Thankful
for, say, "I'm thankful I didn't get caught" and refuse to
say anything more.

3. Bring along old recorded football games, pop them in the
VCR when Dad's not looking. Make sure it is set to the last
two minutes of the game. When he comes into the room, turn
off the VCR and turn on the regular TV.

4. Bring a date that only talks about the tragic and abusive conditions
known to
exist at turkey farms.

5. During mid-meal turn to mom and say, "See mom, I told you they
wouldn't
notice that the Turkey was past expiration date. You were worried for
nothing."

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Angelbears Weekend Tube War
Hi are you looking for a Tube List that shares any kind of tube under
the sun?
well look no further pull up your chair get a drink and snack
and start sharing and snagging.
We are a DRAMA FREE LIST and all your emails can be forwarded
to other groups.
Ratings range from G to EAC make sure it is marked in the
subject lines. Some people don't like SAC and above and we want to
respect that.
For list leaders you are allowed to put ONE ad per email at the bottom
along with our disclaimer. Minimum 10 sends per war so jump right
in and make some friends and collect some goodies :)

Click here to Join ABWTW

Angelbearlady32@aol.com

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LynnLynn's Links
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If You haven't joined LynnLynn's mailing List yet, send a blank
e-mail to LynnLynns-links-subscribe@Yahoogroups.com

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Subscribers and Friends

Melva/A Blessed Thanksgiving
http://www.silverandgoldandthee.com/Holiday2/ADayOf.html

Poems Of The Week
http://ministry-webs.com/ministry/brotherbob/

Rick w/ Thanksgiving Prayer~
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/r/ThanksPrayer.html

Rick w/ Thanksgiving Time~
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Cruise_2000/ram/ThanksgivingTime.html

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Surfin Surfari

~~I Give Thanks~~Graphics by Ultimate Designs
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/IGiveThanks.htm

~~Give Thanks~~ Graphics by Moon and Back
http://www.reflectionsofsouthbreeze.com/Pages/givethanks.htm

Thank You Lord!
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/thanks.html

Lora w/Thanksgiving In Our Hearts
http://www.loratrue2000.com/poems/thanksinheart.htm

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Tech Talk ( Computers and Web-tv)

This Turkey Just Got Fed Up With Thanksgiving
http://www.dogwork.com/ctt4

Thanksgiving Desserts
http://www.shangralafamilyfun.com/easy.html

Thanksgiving
http://members.tripod.com/~MarneysPlace/thanksgiving1.html

Thanksgiving
http://www.elite.net/~kilerat/swfsjust4u/thanksgiving/TG.html

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Animal World

Safe Thanksgiving for Cats
http://cats.about.com/od/seasonalsafety/tp/Thanksgiving.htm

Thanksgiving Dinner For Your dog
http://www.thepoop.com/thanksgiving.asp

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Movie Links

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IKEA Adverts
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90203.htm

I love the beach
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90204.htm

Indian teacher explaining the word fuck
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90205.htm

Jihadist Trainees
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90206.htm

Jingle Balls
http://www.buffaloschips.com/90207.htm

Peanut Butter Jelly Time
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdfsdv.htm

OK
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dsijj.htm

Oops
http://www.buffaloschips.com/yuiu.htm

Parent VS Kids
http://www.buffaloschips.com/dsfsdj.htm

Parking 1
http://www.buffaloschips.com/sdfsd.htm

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buffalo Chips
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My family always goes to BUFFALO, Ok for our Thanksgiving dinner, mainly
cause
thats where grandma lives. There's about 50 or so of us crowded around,
some
cooking, some watching football,some playing card, the usual stuff. My
cousin
Billy Bob(his real name) married this witch that we all hated. She was
just
naturally rude, crude and probably tatooed. She was always bitchin about
something. Grandma always made the dressing. As she got older, it
sometimes
didn't look and taste as good as it used to, but we loved her, and we
ate it.
Well, my cousin and his wife came late one Thanksgiving and of course
most of
the dressing was gone, and as usual she started bitchin. About the
dressing, how
it looked, why wasn't there more of it........ After dinner, my cousins
and I,
I'm the oldest and I'm 47 went out to smoke, and of course we all
congregate
around the newest truck. My uncle Jack was holding court telling us
youngsters
the newest sale barn jokes when SHE came out. Still bitchin about the
dressing.
I said you probably wonder why that dressing looked different this year
and why
it was almost all gone when you got here, huh? Thats because its coyote
dressing. No way she said. Yip, and theres the coyote we made it out of.
Her
eyes bugged out, cause we had planned our little smoking session at the
truck
with the dead coyote in the back. Out in Buffalo, you don't mess with
our
grandma. Tweetlegayle

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Toon Chips
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Free Estimates
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32817.htm

Can't Be Right
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32818.htm

Lift Your Leg
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32819.htm

Life Sucks
http://www.buffaloschips.com/v20.htm

Mackerel
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32821.htm

Male
http://www.buffaloschips.com/32822.htm

Chicken Shit
http://www.buffaloschips.com/41004.htm

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Limerick Chips
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He laid her on the table
So white clean and bare.
His forehead wet with beads of sweat
He rubbed her here and there.

He touched her neck and then her breast
And then drooling felt her thigh.
This bird was wet and all was set,
He gave a joyous cry.

The hole was wide, he looked inside
All was dark and murky.
He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms
And then he stuffed the turkey!

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Parting Chips
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Archie and Jock, are sitting in the pub discussing Jock's forthcoming
wedding."Arch, it's all going grand," says Jock. "I've got everything
organised already: the flowers, the church, the cars, the reception, the
rings, the minister, even ma stag night...Archie nods approvingly."I've
even bought a kilt to be married in!" continues Jock."A kilt?" exclaims
Archie, "that's braw, you'll look pure smart in that!"And what's the
tartan?" Archie enquires."Oh," says Jock, "I imagine she'll be in white
!!

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Katie's Komfort Kolumn - Written By BJ Cassady
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Adult Adult

*********************************************

Remember 9/11/01

Regarding any problems unsubscribing from this mailing list

In accordance with the 2004 Can-Spam act you can contact me at:

William Brabant
711 Pine Street Apt.1
Sault Ste Marie Michigan 49783

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Compilation and narrative copyright 2002 by william Brabant
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