[postmanscorner] THE POSTMAN




welcome to:
THE POSTMAN!
Let me give a big shout out to my friend Doris. She was
worried about me eating all that Halloween candy yesterday?
Well, the war department conviscated all them bags of chocolate.
(dummy me left the receipt in the bag) So she conviscated
the stuff and gave it to our grand kids.So I live to entertain
you for another day! I do feel sorry for the trick or treaters
last night. Got nary a one: The weather was frightful as it
dropped snowy white stuff on God's country here in beautiful
West Michigan. OMG. winter is coming!




 
Mark had an operation and was coming out of the ether. He looked at the 
two other patients in nearby beds and said, "Thank God that's over!" "Don't be too sure,"
said Benson in the next bed, "they left a sponge in me and had to cut me open again." 
Rankin in a bed on the other side of Mark added, "They had to open me up too, just to recover 
one of their instruments." Just then the doctor stuck his head in the door and called, 
"Anyone seen my cell phone?" Mark fainted.​
 
Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?
​She wanted to get a dark tan. ​



 
 
My two-year-old daughter, Paige, was with her mother while her older sister was being examined 
by a dentist.  Paige kept herself busy playing with toys in the waiting room until she noticed 
that her mom was resting, her eyes closed. ​
​With about six other patients waiting, Paige marched up to her mother, looked her straight in 
the face and shook her shoulder. ​
​"Mommy," she yelled, "wake up!  This is not church!" ​
​My wife, Lani, woke from her doze to the sound of other patients laughing. ​
​
A woman was not feeling well so she visited her doctor. ​
​The good doctor, after giving her a thorough examination, said grimly, "Mrs. Goode, 
I am sorry to have to say this, but if you want to get well again you would have to lose a foot." ​
​"What!?! You mean my foot has to be amputated?" ​
​"Oh, no, no..." replied the good doctor, "I mean you have to lose a foot from around your waistline!" ​


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