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This Christmas, we gather our families and we celebrate the season. Let us not forget, however, the less fortunate. It may not be an easy time of year for some. Perhaps there may be those in need. And always be sure to offer your help to these folks, maybe a gift to the benevolent fund, perhaps you may want to gather a few extra items from your cupboards for dontating a food basket to the local pantry. And above all, be sure to put your beer on the lower shelf of the fridge. That way, short people in need will be able to reach it. you will be glad you did.
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!
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THE COMICS
sparkling holidays
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p011. html Santa discovers talent
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p012. html where is he?
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p013. html the Christmas spirit
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p014. html medical expense
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p015. html a great xxxxmas present
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p018. html congratulations!
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/p020. html not always what it seems
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/da/movies880 .html sometimes it just ain't yer day
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/da/movies881 .html more of it ain't yer day
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/da/movies882 .html an office prank
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/da/movies884 .html have a coke
http://www.thepostmanscorner. net/da/movies886 .html
A truck driver is cruising along when he spots a little yellow man standing
in the middle of the road, crying. He brings the truck to a standstill,
rolls down the window and asks the little man what's wrong. "I'm yellow,
I'm from Venus, I'm gay and I'm hungry," sobs the little man. "Well,"
says the trucker, "I can offer you a sandwich, but that's as much as I can do." So he passes a sandwich to the little man and drives off. A while later, he has to stop again because there's a little red man in the middle of the
road, crying. So he comes to a halt, rolls down the window and a bit more
impatiently - asks the little man what the matter is. "I'm red, I'm from Mars,
I'm gay and I'm thirsty," the little man bawls. So the trucker says,
"I can offer you a can of Coke, but that's as much as I can do."
He hands a can of Coke down to the little man and drives off. A little
further on, the trucker spots a little blue man in the middle of the road.
Really annoyed now, he stops, rolls down the window and snaps, "Yes, you silly little blue moffie, what fucking planet are you from and what do you want?" The little man answers, "Your driver's licence, please.."
_______________
Little Johnny and his girl were walking along a trail in the woods. Suzy
noticed that some of the animals were behaving oddly. "Little Johnny, why is that rabbit on top that other one?" she asked.Little Johnny stopped to
consider his answer, and replied, "They're making cigarettes." "Cigarettes?" she exclaimed, as they continue walking along.Pretty soon they approached a couple of raccoons. Suzy asked, "Are they making cigarettes too?""Yea," says Little Johnny.Suzy looked around and said, "it looks like all the animals are making cigarettes, why don't we make cigarettes?" Little Johnny was quick to say, "OK!"A hour or so later Little Johnny and Suzy were walking out of the woods, when she asked, "Little Johnny, what kind of cigarettes did we make?" Little Johnny stopped to think about his answer, then replied, "Well if you get a hump in your belly it's a Camel, and if you don't it was a Lucky Strike."
____________________
"Y'all got any American razor blades in here?" the Texan asked the London pharmacist. "All I see are these damn Wilkinsons." "Sir," the Englishman patiently replied, "Wilkinson has been producing the finest surgical instruments, weapons and razors since before Waterloo." "I don't give a damn if they passed them out on Noah's Ark if they ain't any good," the Texan retorted."I can assure you they are very good sir." the peeved druggist said. "Why just last year, my wife swallowed one. It gave her a tonsillectomy, an appendectomy, a hysterectomy, circumcised the gardener, emasculated a neighbor, cut two of a delivery boy's fingers off at the knuckle -- and I still got 10 shaves out of it."
________________ A man was showing his friend a new set of matched golf
clubs he had just bought.
"Doctor's orders," the man told his friend. "My wife and
I have been gaining too much weight and we went to see the
doctor about it. He said we needed more exercise, so I
joined the country club and bought myself this set of golf
clubs.""What did you buy your wife?" the friend asked.
The man said, "A new matching bicycle and lawn mower."
_______________ A ship is always referred to as "she" because it costs so much to
keep one in paint and powder. -- Chester NimitzI'm a simple man. All I want is enough sleep for two normal men,
enough whiskey for three, and enough women for four.-- Joel RosenbergThis guy says, "I'm perfect for you, cause I'm a cross between a
macho and a sensitive man." I said, "Oh, a gay trucker?"-- Judy Tenuta
_________________ LAB LAUGHSI went to the doctors
http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_ toon.php? id=A20071130 No Decorating
http://www.lablaughs.com/adult_ toon.php? id=A20071202 Dog Christmas
http://www.lablaughs.com/clean_ toon.php? id=C20071204 Before Chat Rooms
http://www.buffalosjokes.com/ 56465456. htm THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!
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