welcome to:
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
(where the world goes for its daily dose of humor!)
made in the USA
Good morning postman fans!
A letter from a reader!
Hey postman,
Sometime ago you offered those quit smoking pages for free,
are those still available? I want to get some because my brother got them
and he hasn't had a snoke in a month. Congrats to your brother!
Girl202a
Hello Girl!
sure they are, and you can get them for FREE!
FREE!!!
Complimentary NicoDerm CQ 3 Step Kit - Get Yours Now
DO YOU WANT TO STOP SMOKING?
NicoDerm CQ 3 Step Kit
see below for participation details
Take our national smoking survey!
Then participate for NicoDerm CQ Patches + 3 Step, 6 Week Kits.
http://www.tinyurl.
And while you are at it, do you want some FREE brita water products?
Congratulations! Get your FREE* Brita water products!
-pitchers
-refrigerator filters
-faucet mounts
*with completion of Sponsor Offers
http://www.tinyurl.
FIREARMS REFRESHER COURSE
1. An armed man is a citizen. An unarmed man is a subject.
2. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.
3. Colt: The original point and click interface.
4. Gun control is not about guns; it's about control.
5. If guns are outlawed, can we use swords?
6. If guns cause crime, then pencils cause misspelled words.
7. "Free" men do not ask permission to bear arms.
8. If you don't know your rights you don't have any.
9. Those who trade liberty for security have neither.
10. The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights reserved.
11. What part of "shall not be infringed" do you not understand?
12. The Second Amendment is in place in case the politicians ignore the
others.
13. 64,999,987 firearms owners killed no one yesterday.
14. Guns only have two enemies; rust and politicians.
FROM: THE INVESTIGATIVE REPORTS BUREAU OF
THE POSTMAN'S CORNER!
The Federal Witness Protection Program has come up with
a sure-fire method for making absolutely certain that
people entering the program are NEVER found by anyone.
They just change the witness's name to G. Spot
We do hope you enjoy today's issue!
Cordially
Martin aka the postman!
LET'S GO TO THE MOVIES!
when you want a woman badly
http://www.thepostm
what you are
http://www.thepostm
a blond in traffic
http://www.thepostm
life as it is
http://www.thepostm
THE COMICS
huh?
http://www.thepostm
the mother load
http://www.thepostm
disaster
http://www.thepostm
where are your manners?
http://www.thepostm
nervous
http://www.thepostm
you found it?
http://www.thepostm
Jon came home in great excitement and said to his wife,
"Judi, love, you'll never believe it, dear, but I've
discovered an entirely new position for lovemaking."
"Really," she said, interested at once. "What is it?"
"Back to back," Jon replies
"But that's crazy. We can't do anything back to back."
"Yes, we can," he says. "I've persuaded another couple to help out!"
__________
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a brick?
A: When you lay a brick, it doesn't follow you around for two weeks whining.
___________
Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year
old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.
____________
A Texan, a Russian, and a New Yorker are sitting in a
restaurant in London. The waiter says, "Excuse me, but
the steak on the menu is not available, as there's a shortage."
The Texan asks, "What's a shortage?"
The Russian asks, "What's a steak?"
The New Yorker asks, "What does 'excuse me' mean?"
____________
A middle-aged woman seemed sheepish as she visited her
gynecologist. "Come now," coaxed the doctor, " you've been
seeing me for years. There's nothing you can't tell me."
"This one's kind of strange..."
"Let me be the judge of that," the doctor replied.
"Well," she said, "yesterday I went to the bathroom in the
morning and heard a plink-plink-
I looked down, the water was full of pennies."
"I see."
"That afternoon I went to the bathroom again and, plink-
plink-plink, there were nickels in the bowl." " That night,"
she went on, "I went again, plink-plink-
were dimes and this morning there were quarters. You've
got to tell me what's wrong with me!," she implored.
"I'm scared out of my wits!"
The gynecologist put a comforting hand on her shoulder.
"There, there, it's nothing to be scared about."
"You're simply going through the change."
____________
A woman took her car to her mechanic. She told him 'Everytime I take any of
my friends out in my car, after awhile there is this terrible smell. It
never happens when I am on my own."
This quite intrigued the mechanic, so he said "OK, let's go for a spin and
see what the problem is."
She drove down a one-way street in the wrong direction at 60 MPH, swerving,
hitting the curb on both sides of the street, narrowly missed three
pedestrians in a pedestrian crossing, ran several red lights and just missed
a policeman on street traffic duty.
They returned to the shop and she said, 'There it is now, there's that
terrible smell. Can you smell it?'
"Smell it?? Lady, I'm sittin in it. . ."
THAT'S ALL FOLKS!
Have a nice day!
FROM:
Martin aka the postman!
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